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” Bruce” / security expert / personnel

“If it moves, I am on it”   [ except rats]

As far as security goes I look after dogs and humans, it’s Bert’s job to take care of the rats, gees he even eats them, damn I was born in the wild and even I wouldn’t eat a dead rat..

We had one of our own pass away yesterday, “BART”  we will miss him..

Personnel ; well  I’m the guy who decides and enforces who moves in [ with Bert’s help ]  if they don’t fit in they are gone or they have to eat out side. We have; ‘ Bob‘ a elder female [nasty old thing] , ‘Bernie’ he’s a hobo comes and stays for a while then leaves then comes back [he’s on cat door guard ] ‘Bernice‘ a real old female [ one  mean nasty old bat] she is inherited , ‘ahBabe‘  young wild male who sleeps a lot and gets picked on by the females [has wonky eyes and blows snot all over the place]  ‘Pete‘ another wild male cat, this one I do not allow in the house, he eats and sleeps out side, he likes to fight but I can take him [with Bert’s help] ‘ BW‘ male, pure white ,deaf, blind in one eye, he is from down the hill but comes up for breakfast gets stoned on cat nip and leaves [like that guy]… and ‘Bert’,he watches the stills and has to keep the coons out of the house [he’s bigger] some times there are a dozen  of them eating out back  [when Bert gets in one of his moods he sits down at the coon station and won’t let them eat. [ that damn cat is crazy ]… As you can see mine is not an easy job… And then there are the humans who are handy to have around, they open the cat food cans {hard on my teeth} open doors when I am to lazy to use the cat door and scratch places I can’t reach, But they are a noisy group, always stepping on you, wanting to sit in your chair, sleep on your bed, vacuum when you are trying to get some rest….  annoying put handy….

June 17/16

Well its been a few years so I will give you a update; first ‘ Pete’ is older now and doesn’t want to fight all the time, which is good I was getting tiered of kicking his butt.. Betty is still here but now lives in the house and turns out to be a guy.. Think I told you ahBabe  passed on, BW doesn’t come around much anymore, but the rest are still here  Bob, Bernie who quit being a hobo and lives here full time and is the back door guard fulltime, Bernice  who smells worse every day and of course Bert who is still Bert, he went into one of his moods a few days back kill three rats and fought with any thing that moved, it’s a moon thing and now we are getting a new one the big guy calls ” Spike Lee” because he is pure black , He eats down at the coon station and minds his manners so he is ok, Plus there is one more gray one that’s starting to sleep in the car port, I will have to have a chat with it..  All most forgot two Crows have move here also, they eat on the back deck and we have come to a understanding, they no caw I no chase…   That’s it…

 

 

 

Feb24/14
Got a good deal on some old USAF rockets thought I’d use them for yard security..

Mar 12/14

It’s getting  a little nuts around here, Bert hasn’t killed a rat in over a week and he is starting to get mean, he has chased and fought with every one, that guy needs fresh blood, some say we [ cats ] act weird during a full moon, this is not true , we act weird all the time but it is the week before the full moon that gets us going the most and if the big guy [human] calls me a ” hairy ass rodent ” one more time I’m going to shred his under ware with him in them….

March 22/14
Found this video ,thought I’d dedicate it to the big guy [human]

 

August 19/14

Well its been busy around here ,the big guy and Bert  have been selling stills and testing new units and are now selling supplies also , But now the bad news, since the last time the big guy let me use this thing we have lost ahBabe and  I liked that little fella. Bernie has come and gone a few times and is gone at this time, he left about 3 weeks back.. Bert, now this guy is getting fat and meaner , I have tried to wop his fat butt a few times, but he is  mean ,so I wait till he is sleeping then I jump on him ,get in a few good shots then run like hell .

We maybe getting a new cat, there is this new one eating down at the coon station that the big guy calls Betty, that is how it starts , first the coon station then the sun deck, then the house , just what I need around here another moody female…